so let's go nowhere.

SO the plan was to smoke a little and go cosmic bowling. we wanted to actually do something that night, rather than just sit around (which isn't a bad thing). well, you guessed it: we didn't go. while 3 of us were slowly getting drunk off cheap vodka and dark beer and conversation and singalongs, Cait, being the responsible one she always is, called the bowling alley, just to check and make sure the place existed/was still open/offered this thing known as 'cosmic bowling.' well, all were true, but there was an hour wait and by the time we got there, we'd be rushed on time. so we proceeded to drink a little more. then a little more.

we unanimously decided to go to the Applebees on route 22. at this point, Amanda and myself were in our own little world, living and breathing right there in Cait's backseat. the blurred lights along the highway reminded me that I was not too far from my own dwelling, which was nice. knowing us, we had vodka disguised in a water bottle, which was passed between the two of us several times on the way. the rest was evenly distributed in our cold beverages upon arrival.

we staggered and stumbled into the restaurant and took advantage of the half-price appetizers. good call. while accompanying John in the restroom, a young man quickly exited a bathroom stall and made his way to the sink area. he was sniffling quite a bit and flaring and carefully inspecting his nostrils in the mirror. god only knows what he was up to in there. BUT since this was the route 22 Applebees, he was probably just highway traffic, passing through on a chilly January late night, enjoying some refreshing coke. no ice.

home bound, I found myself in a painful dilemma. i begged and begged and pleaded for Cait to simply pull the car over so I could relieve myself. "no no no, we're almost back" they all [lied] to me. looking back, it probably would have been bad to urinate right there on route 22 at 1:30something. after pouring the rest of the water out the window, Amanda handed me a water bottle. i unbuckled my belt but just couldn't do it. ONE) water bottles have tiny openings (i'm not 4 anymore) and TWO) i would have pissed all over me and Cait's car. well, long story short, we found a secluded place to pull over and the deed was done. some say it was the longest piss ever.

so now I owe Cait. I owe her big time. but hell, I'd do it all again.